If you loved 'This Is Spinal Tap' then one of your favorite parts must have been Nigel telling Rob Reiner all about his beloved collection of guitars and how proud he was of the Marshall that could go to 'Eleven".
So now it's upon us...the date of all dates...11/11/11. What does that even mean exactly?
It has numeric significance. Eleven is a magical number. I see it almost every day along with those other numbers that the "Midwayers" like to show me. 12:12, 12:34, 3:33 etc...
They're letting me know they're around. I find it comforting to know I am not alone. The Midwayers are the entities that are closest to the Earth and are not quite angels. That is what I have gathered from my research, and I feel their presence constantly. I always wonder what messages they are trying tell me.
I find it very fascinating and will probably expand more on them in future blogs so STAY TUNED!
I hear many say that 11:11 is a time to make a wish. I can dig that. I LOVE making wishes!
I hear it's the time to when the Gates of Heaven are open.
I have heard it is a time of awakening and that 12:12 is a time for taking action upon that awakening. In much of my research I have seen a plethora of meanings and symbols due to this special set of numbers. It is actually quite a vast subject if you hit the Information Super Highway.
It is reported that an unusual number of couples plan to marry on this special date.
Gamblers favor the number 11 as well. I have been drawn to 11 for many years actually. But I have a special affinity to this number because if it's affiliation with the movie. I had a boyfriend who used to tell me that I went "to eleven".
He said it was because of my intensity and how I do everything to the Nth Degree, and that am 'Over The Top'. This is true about me. And I have learned to accept it and love it about myself. Yet learning to turn down the dial when it's turned up in a negative tune. Ha! Cuz no one likes that noise, right?
I'm not exactly sure how I will spend this special date...probably just 'Play It As It Lays'...maybe start a new beginning. Whatever it is I do...I have a feeling it will "go to eleven..."
The title of this blog happens to be a title to one of my favorite songs by one of my all time favorite bands...that's right....RUSH! And if you can't dig it well then you can just shove it!
Not only is the song really beautiful musically (in my humble opinion) but the lyrics have a great message about something that is really the most important thing in life when you think about it...The Heart!
And RUSH is a band that is all about that! They totally stayed close to their own heart and wrote and played what they felt. I, among others, have felt that is why they became and stayed so hugely successful. They played it like they felt it...did NOT bow down to commercialism. And yes, they are definitely an acquired taste. Probably why I have gotten shit for liking them by some, but I see their originality, their chemistry, their undeniable talent and their music literally has put chills through my body. The gods of music brought these 3 together and the rest is history.
Ok so enough about RUSH. What I am really trying to get to is the 'heart' of the matter. It all starts with the heart. If you truly follow your heart, you are being true to yourself. It is who you really are! Notice how whenever you point in reference to yourself, you point to the center of your being, you point to your HEART! You don't say "I" and point to your head, because you are not your mind! Don't get me wrong, we need that mind of ours, it becomes especially valuable when we feel we are losing it! But we shouldn't begin and end with it. We should use it to help us make good decisions but the heart should always be the deciding factor. Don't shut it out. Because if you do, you will never truly be where you want, or with who you really want either.
That is when meditation is so key. I am always interested in learning about psychic ability. Mostly because I believe it is an inherent part of us we don't use, much like most of our brain. When I was reading about my favorite psychic ever, Edgar Cayce, he imparts the significance of meditating in order to get clearer psychic visions or hear messages...whichever of your gifts is stronger.
So why would that be?? Meditation is shutting off that constant chatter of the hard drive of our system. THE MIND! Always running...constantly processing...getting in the way of our true higher selves. Our true selves KNOW what we truly want...where we truly want to be and who we truly want to be with. Our true selves know all the answers too. But have you ever noticed when you think too much about something, the answer just gets farther away?
In my spiritual practice we chant. We can chant for whatever we want, and we do. There are no conditions, and that is why I practice this particular sect of Buddhism. One thing I have heard in regards to when we are chanting for something we want, or want the answer to, or want to get through is NOT to THINK about it! Don't try to strategize! Just come from the HEART! It's all about the heart...it always is. You can never go wrong that way.
Although one thing I will say in regards to that (as a disclaimer) is not to come from a place that is totally selfish. I mean, I know of that expression..."The heart wants what it wants..." But if what you want is your friend's lover it's not OK to go for it because you feel you are "following your heart." That's just plain selfish and wrong and you know it. You can do whatever you want in this life, just know with every cause there is an effect. And you will reap what you sow...trust me on that one. That law is just that strict, like gravity...it is what it is. INSTANT KARMA.
And plus that really isn't coming from the heart. That is being self-centered. And when you truly come from the heart and are honest and real about it, my guess is that you wont be self-centered...you will be the 'centered-self'. Big difference, right?
In my last blog, "Spock was probably a Scorpio..." I tried to illustrate the importance of being in touch with your own heart, and actually the hearts of others too. Empathy is not such a bad idea these days. We have become such a self-absorbed society it actually is disgusting, that is if you want my personal opinion on the matter.
Love is what it's all about. Love is the answer. Love is all you need.
I mean, that's why we are all here, right? To love and be loved. Help each other and make the best of it while we are here. To grow and become better people and to help others do the same? That's the stuff we'll be taking when we leave...not the most toys...those stay here. But if that was the case, then it's your empty soul that goes with ya! hahaha!
Lately I have been fighting getting brought down in my own psychic mud. I have been using the tools I have learned along the way and winning over some of my negativity and the challenges I have been facing lately. Last night I joined a group at the center where I practice. There is a special group that meets once a month for the issues of Mental Health. It is run by a psychiatric nurse and some other therapists that practice this kind of Buddhism. So I thought I would join them for encouragement, for my own feelings but more importantly to get some advice on how to cope with someone I love so dearly that is struggling with schizophrenia. When I think about it for more than 20 seconds I will most certainly start to cry. I was prepared to be very teary and emotionally and physically drained after the meeting. I chanted beforehand for the best outcome. And in fact I left that meeting so inspired!
I was so happy and filled with hope and a better perspective about the whole situation...even just about life. As well as this incredible POWER we all have within, to transform ANY situation! Change any poison into medicine...and create value in whatever it is we are dealing with. And how do we do this?? Well I choose to chant, because that is how I get 'closer to the heart' but I think if we point our bow in any direction, as long as the arrow comes from the heart we will hit the 'Bull's Eye' every time!
On the way home I felt better than I had in a long time. I had hope, I felt SO much LOVE! As I drove home my iPod (which I think is possessed by the way, because of it's uncanny knack to play whatever I am feeling or thinking...that's a whole other blog anyway) Nevertheless...a song came on that I have always loved so much because of it's beautiful sentiment and raw emotion. It was "All Of My Love" by the mighty Led Zep. A song written by Robert Plant about the death of his young son, Karac in '77. He was only 4 and lost his short life to a virus. How torturous that must be, to bury your own child, so young. If I really think about it and empathize, I will cry. I'm not going to lie, the thought of it breaks my heart to pieces.
The song is so amazing. I love the keyboard intro, followed by Bonham's drums...and then the sound of Robert's soulful vocals and lovely lyrics about how he feels so much love for his son. He sings with sadness but almost a sense of triumph...and joy for knowing and loving his son. It is uplifting as well as bittersweet. But what I love the most is that even though the song is about one of the most traumatic subjects you could find, you can still hear the almost haunting sadness, but the glory of his deep and undying love. It is very real and so touching.
As I listened to it on the way home, I was in such a great and positive, loving state. I appreciated that song like I never had before. Music moves me more than the average person, I am a very sensitive soul, but this was something I could really feel with my heart. Probably because I feel it expanding so much lately with the things I have been doing...changing my perspective, chanting, meditating, studying and most importantly coming from the heart!
(wish there was a better video for this amazing masterpiece of music)
Before you, my dear Scorpio's, get your tails up ready to sting...I am only referring to your gift / curse of being able to detach. Maybe something I even envy of you at times.
The thing is with Scorpios (at least some of the ones I have known...and I knew them well) is that they are actually very sensitive. Being Water Signs they are more emotional, and also probably the most psychic of all the others in the Zodiac. Probably due to their extreme sensitivity, and because of that I think they also must shut down for their own self-preservation. They are INTENSE and that's what I LOVE about them! It always draws me in...the depth and darkness. I myself have Scorpio Rising, so I get it.
My Mother and younger sister are Scorpios...as well as my last 2 boyfriends (who happened to have the exact same birthday...YIKES!) In the last 2 years living in my Treehouse, I have found TWO of them in my bedroom...not talking about the last two men in my life either! TWO ACTUAL SCORPIONS! When I asked my landlady about the 1st one, she told me they are not native to this part of the mountain. She has never seen one in the 47 years she has lived on this property. Neither had any of the neighbors. When I told about the 2nd one I found she said..."You must have a thing with Scorpio's..." HA! Do I ever!
The 1st Visitor...I set him free after a long hike out to Tennessee Valley Beach
The 2nd Visitor...set him free on top of Mount Tamalpais...at my sacred spot.
I have noticed that Scorps can be so guarded. Back them into a corner about something and IT'S ON! Get ready for that venomous sting! After all they are just a little insect, but can be quite fierce! They can get down right mean if you call them on their shit. And JEALOUS? Some of the ones I have known get SO much so, they can't even admit it. Part of the guarding thing I suppose. And maybe because if they acknowledge it, it would unleash it. "RELEASE THE KRAKEN!!" Ha ha! I noticed many of them have to play it cool, always the cool facade...even if they are a hurricane of wild emotions inside. That's just how they roll I guess. It may be how they protect themselves. Not all have these traits...just an observation on some I have known.
They can be SO goddamn MAGNETIC too! It can be lethal if one has a hold on you...Vulcan Death Grip! I kid you not. Poor Nurse Chapel! To be in love with Spock all those years and he could never quite love her back...although I'm sure he must have in his Half-Human sort of way.
They can be secretive and protective, not only of themselves but of their loved ones. Another thing I love about them.
But what I don't love is their coldness at times. For all that passion and intensity they can shut down on you like a robot...or a full blooded Vulcan you could say. Almost creepy to someone like me who mostly comes from the heart. I heard once that they make good doctors because they are compassionate but can possess the detachment needed for what needs to be done...such as surgery and cool headed thinking under pressure. I on the other hand feel everything...probably too much so. So I look to them for their ability to have logic even if it is a little unfeeling at times. So my question is...when does it get to a level that is entering into self-destructiveness? When walls keep you from feeling...taking chances...going to the next level in yourself or with another person. A paralyzing fear keeping you in almost a self-made prison.
That makes me sad when I think of some I have known who built that life for themselves. But maybe it makes them sad when they see me drowning in an ocean of my feelings and emotions...with no way to rescue myself when I am really lost at sea.
I guess the answer would be for anyone of extremes to learn to take the 'Middle Path'. And that is a big part of my journey...this Aquarian Odyssey I am on. Learning to stay balanced in my 'wise mind'...not too emotional...not too logical. I am getting better at it...balancing. Well, my moon is in Libra so maybe I have half a chance?!
With Spock...I assume it was a hard balance...Half Human / Half Vulcan. Probably really conflicted at times. Torn between his two natures. I am not a HUGE Trekkie but like a lot of what the show had to offer. As my dear friend, Steve put it.... "The original series had many of the finest writers of the time, and did their best to talk about our problems in society in a Fantasy format. Including everything from racism, to the sexual revolution...."
It truly was a ground breaking show and I respect it for what it did for society. I was discussing something with Steve the other day, probably about Scorpios, maybe one in particular...maybe just about being detached... And we came up with the Spock theory. I said "Spock was probably a Scorpio..." and then that launched into the whole Star Trek discussion. Did I mention that we are NERDS?!
The episode is called "Amok Time". The coping of his feelings and his shut down side nearly kills him. That must be so hard to have that inner conflict going on inside yourself. One thing I will say about the way I deal with my feelings is that I feel them and let them out. Keeping stuff inside can really make you sick. It can even kill you. I have the courage to feel and admit those feelings...even if they aren't "cool". In my personal belief system, I find it even more "cool" to be able to be honest with yourself and truly know yourself and most importantly own up to whatever it is that is in your heart.
Although people that come solely from the heart can really get themselves into trouble. I can personally attest to that! But what gets us where we really need to go in life is our intuition. That internal personal GPS system that a lot of us have shut down because we let our minds run the show. I think our intuition is our "wise mind". It's that middle path between cold, calculating confining prison of the mind and the full throttle high octane explosion of emotions. One way is super limiting, the other can lead towards destruction.
In reference to my dear Scorpios, this is a sign of REGENERATION! I love that! Death and Rebirth! In the Tarot, the Death Card is the sign associated with Scorpio.
And they actually are the only sign to have more than one astrological symbol. The Scorpion and the Eagle...or some say 'The Phoenix' and that is true for them as well. "The Phoenix from the Ashes"!! They say coming into this life as a Scorpio you must completely face your entire lower nature, where one is tested and has struggles to endure to overcome the weaknesses characteristic of that sign....selfish desire, pride, anger...etc... When the tests have been passed one evolves to the Eagle, or Phoenix I would suppose. So even though Scorps kinda get a lot of "bad press" as far as the signs go, they can be quite evolved if they can push through those limiting behaviors. It must not be easy to transform from a lowly little ground dwelling insect to the heights of one of the most revered animals of the Animal Kingdom. But man, when they do...what an accomplishment and AMAZING feeling that must be!
Best of luck and highest wishes to you, my dear Scorpios! I believe in your undeniable STRENGTH and POWER! I know you will make it to where Eagles soar! And come up as The Phoenix that you are, in all your fiery blaze of glory from whatever ashes you find yourself in!
Just remember whatever 'Odyssey' you may be on, try to keep it on The Middle Path...and don't forget to use your Internal GPS!
